5. I'm beat at 2:15am - getting too old for this shit. I offer to drive home from gig. 99.9% of the time I drive to the show with my Drummer, Shawn. This gesture allows Shawn to swill booze without the worry of DUI. I think Shawn likes number 5 more than I do.
4. While loading / unloading my 4 X 12 Marshall slant cab, Me or Shawn will make the following statement - "Hue needs to get a 2 X12 or smaller, The coolness of the Marshall is starting to wear off". WE PLAY BARS NOT SOME CONCERT HALL!!!
3. At least half of the people in the bar will be watching television - I am so tired of competing with baseball or IFC. HEY BAR OWNERS MAKE UP YOUR MIND ON WHAT KIND OF BAR YOU WANT!
2. Drunk person in crowd will come up to the stage in hopes of getting their (even drunker) friend on stage - because he or she "has the best voice you will ever hear". This person will bother you all night until you let their drunk friend sing - or tell them to f-off.
NOTE: if drunk person does not have a friend they want to get on stage to perform, they will request old and obscure songs we don't do. (i.e. Some drunk idiot who says, "PLAY HANG ON SLOOPY!" they repeat this request all evening or until you kill them). HANG ON SLOOPY????
1. Someone will come up to you and give you a complement, then follow it up by saying, "hope you guys make it"... Huh? Shit I thought we did make it, I mean we get paid to play music. Being in our 40s, we're not trying to get signed to a recording deal. Even if we were trying to get signed, thanks to MTV - music is about being cute - not talented (and I'm neither). Nobody is going to sign a 40-ish year old "husky" fellow to a contract. Meat Loaf and John Popper were the last "husky" fellows who fronted bands - those days are over.
Fat rappers (not to be confused with Phat rappers) are exceptions to the rule, especially if the paunchy poets have the word "fat" or "Big" in their name (see Fat Joe, Big Pun, or Notorious B.I.G. for examples).
9/4/07
Top 5 things that happen at almost EVERY Gig...
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4 comments:
Sounds like a very different scene. I've never had to compete with TV, or had to deal with the #2 scenario - that just doesn't happen in NYC, though I did play 'Hang On Sloopy' in Sex Circus Star, and it was one of our best tunes.
'Make it' - make what?
Just make music, and do it for love.
I'm sure the music scene is much different in NYC - also much different here - if you have an agency. The top clubs will only hire bands who work with agencies they have an agreement with.
The band I'm in play in a lot of legion halls and those "hey what the fuck are you doing in my bar" neighborhood bars.
Sex Circus Star - is an awesome name. I honestly don't thing I have heard "sloopy" in it's entirety.
Great post.
Here's a trivia nugget for ya...
"Hang On Sloopy" was the first song Rick Derringer ever played on that charted.
What can be said of Rick? He's one guy who never got the fact that he was a MUCH better guitar player than song writer, although the All American Boy album is pretty dope.
Oh yeah, I heard that due to global warming and all the doom and gloom it has brought, the world is giving up the healthy look and husky/40ish is coming back in a big way. You and I are going to have to hire lawyers to sort through the contracts that'll be coming our way, and get bodyguards to keep the groupies at bay.
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